What do Children Really Need?©
By Jo Moon
What Do Children See in the World Around Them?
I took an 8 year old child out to a playground recently and on our way home we passed a pub with 12 hour opening times. People were hanging about outside smoking with pints in their hands, in a drunken state. We next passed a man sitting on steps very drunk, rolling up a cigarette. We had to edge our way around him. Its getting dark now with the clocks turned back an hour. We left the playground around 4pm just as some older children had come in and were throwing swings quite violently over the top of the metal stand and huddling in groups smoking. This is the way of the world, this is life in the town or city.
I looked at the pavement wondering what young eyes from a lower angle would see and perceive in this world. There was litter on every pavement, in every street, dog pooh and cigarette stubs. I have to tell this child to dodge the pooh and I somehow want her to avert her eyes to the overall picture of disillusionment around us. Some may argue that a few people smoking and drinking outside a pub is not disillusionment. But I will say that at 4pm on a weekday afternoon it is not a positive thing for people to be hanging around half ‘out of it’ on alcohol, or at any time of day or night for that matter.
We need to be very careful of the world our children see around them. They are vulnerable and susceptible to the energies around them more than we realise; they receive messages about the world from what is in front of their eyes. They are led to believe that it is completely normal to have a drink, go to pubs. They will then be the next generation to carry on with this cycle and so it goes on. All they see around them in towns, cities and villages is pubs and other places selling alcohol. They see on TV constant adverts for alcohol and films, programmes and soaps where people are often smoking and drinking. It is part of everyday culture. Rarely is drinking seen as a bad thing to do unless it is a severe problem – but when exactly is it severe?
Some day there will need to be a massive global change whereby pubs and drinking as a social activity will no longer be the normal thing to do. Instead people will seek out healthy activities rather than unhealthy. Huge healing centres will take over from pubs and instead of going out for a pint people will go out for a healing session, massage, reflexology, counselling session, chanting, meditation or many other therapeutic activities on offer. It will no longer be seen as ‘cool’ or ‘fashionable’ to go out and drink poisonous substances which create ill health, disease and addiction. It will no longer be seen as the thing to do, to collapse in the street with an overdose of alcohol or wake up with a hangover.
People are not given many alternatives at the moment. The world is in chaos and human beings are full of difficult emotions which they have not in general been taught how to deal with. From a young age we have experienced deep rooted emotional issues, some very traumatic, others milder. Some have experienced more pain and suffering than others but we have all no doubt suffered in some way at some time.
Should we Accept Drinking Alcohol as the Normal thing to Do?
To counteract the turbulence, dissatisfaction and difficult deep rooted emotions many people go out to pubs and clubs and have a few drinks as a totally acceptable social norm. Or some may stay at home and drink. But it is all basically the same. I’m sure many will argue with my point here and say that drinking is a harmless and fun activity if not taken to excess. But when is it ok and when does it go beyond that limit? If you have regrets after a night out, or forget exactly what you did or feel sick or vomit or just feel unable to function properly the next day, is that all ok and acceptable for you? Do we just accept that this is the way to live? That this is the way it is? Why should we?
Looking at our internal pain is not always easy. Most of us have some pain somewhere but it is also easy to run away from it, conceal it from ourselves or consciously or unconsciously avoid it in some way. It will always catch up with us somehow though at some time, like a boomerang or picture in the mirror. Drinking is one method of escape, but that will never cure or help anything. It is just a deadly trip downwards to a never ending cycle of inner destruction.
Could we Abolish Pubs and Alcohol Drinking Altogether?
What we do need is big healing centres in place of pubs and for it to become the normal thing for people to meet in these places and receive the healing they really need. The problem now is that many healing activities and therapies are expensive and not accessible to many people who really need them. Therefore these healing centres would need to be subsidised in some way so that healing is given freely or at very low cost. Alcohol and smoking would certainly not be allowed inside or outside. Food could be served in healthy cafes which would also not serve any animal products therefore all food would be vegan and organic and locally produced if possible.
In this new world I would take my child to the playground and afterwards we would wander into the local healing centre. Perhaps my child would attend an emotional intelligence session where she learns how to express and deal with her many different and sometimes difficult emotions. She would be encouraged to draw pictures, act out scenes or engage in play-therapy type activities in order to understand and express herself more in a constructive way. She would learn that she was accepted as a human being and that it is safe to express all her many emotions.
When this child becomes an adult she will learn to interact with others in a more healthy and honest way, knowing that it is safe to be who she is. If all children had this experience we would have a totally new adult population whereby relating to one another and to ourselves would be a far easier, honest and healthy thing to do. We would engage in healing activities when life felt difficult, but we would no longer need the escape of alcohol, tobacco and other mind numbing, destructive drugs because we will have found a far healthier option which will truly serve us as human beings and take us forward as a human race.