I have learnt a huge amount about the nature of healing in the last few months and it seems there is always more to know! Of course this is also because we are evolving as a human race and therefore we discover more and more.
I have had to review a lot of my own ideas about healing as well as my ethical and moral view points.
However the purpose of this article is to add some clarification to my last article and to update you on what has been happening to me.
I got very ill last winter while on a detox programme to eliminate the benign breast lump I have had since 2013. I lost a lot of weight and muscle and generally felt exhausted. I was also having difficulty breathing. This was all scary, very uncomfortable and a bit confusing as I thought I would be getting better, not worse. It got to the stage where I could not even walk 10 minutes to the local shop without feeling like I was going to collapse. Eventually I just couldn’t look after myself any more and I went to stay with my friend Jabeen again.
The breathing got so bad I had to call an ambulance. I had a salt pipe to help with my breathing up til then which I had become very dependant on and I could not lie down at all. I was hoisted downstairs on a seat then put immediately on oxygen which helped a bit and it was all a big relief that I was finally getting some emergency help despite my life long fear of hospitals!
I was in hospital a week and had lots of investigations. The CAT scan showed I had litres of fluid in my lungs which I had drained out. A consultant also told me the CAT scan results which confused me as I wasn’t in a very alert state and I could barely understand what he was saying. But it seemed the cancer had spread everywhere and I wasn’t clear exactly where it had spread, although it was obviously in the lymph system, possibly lungs, liver, bones? I am still not clear about exactly where it had spread and I didn’t really want to know!
Of course, I have been through quite a process, wondering how this had happened to me when I was getting so well. I went through many processes. I never doubted that I would live through this but it turned out a few friends and the medical team thought I would not survive.
It may sound strange, maybe not, but I really couldn’t focus on my diagnosis. Instead I was focusing on small things to get me through the day. I needed to make sure I could get to the toilet, get the right food to eat, have my supplements and find a comfortable position on a chair or bed. There was such a strong part of me that was connected to my soul at this time knowing my soul had to live, my physical body had to survive because I had not completed the purpose I came to Earth for. And in hospital I was drawing with pastels a lot which I love to do but the pictures were bright and positive, not full of darkness and gloom!
Back at Jabeen and Barry’s house a bedroom had been set up for me in the sacred sanctuary. My new regime of remedies, herbs and oil was given to me by my new holistic practitioner, Graham, who was found for me synchronistically by a friend. At this time Jabeen was working full time trying to get me the holistic help I needed and putting out feelers to everyone she knew for help and information. She was also working hard spiritually at this time which was crucial. She was chanting and praying for a miracle for me continually.
A prayer and healing group was also set up for me which I was so grateful for and all the healing and prayers sent to me by others too – I could feel the effects of all this. It was a scary time for us all! Though I was just trying to get through each day, remain calm and have faith that I would be well. As things progressed I was put on huge doses of herbs, cbd oil, castor oil packs, infra red mat and much more!
Jabeen also organised for a powerful healer, Jacqueline Hobbs to give me 3 sessions of healing a week. She works very full time on her healing and spiritual work and especially with people with terminal cancer, with good results! My life would not have made sense if I had passed over at this time. Jacqueline has helped me enormously and she has a lot of spiritual wisdom.
Of course I’ve been through a lot of difficult emotions, pain and discomfort through this time but there have also been amazing discoveries, insights, greater awareness about my life and very deep life changing healing.p
This time has been a necessary part of my healing journey and I have no regrets about anything. Graham does live blood tests on me regularly and about 6 weeks after coming out of hospital the test showed no evidence of any cancer in me though there is a lot more work to be done on removing physical lumps and toxins…I still have not had any conventional treatment for the cancer I had except for a hormon blocker medication.
There is a great deal to write about this journey so I will continue with this blog again and gradually reveal more…
What I do wish to stress is that while it may appear very frustrating that the cancer returned, actually I had not completed my full healing process. I feel very different now in myself. A lot of fears and phobias have left me and I generally feel a lot calmer
and with more faith than I had before. It was another healing process I needed to go through and with many new discoveries through that.
So watch out for more blogs on this adventure called HEALING!